I caught myself in some unhealthy thought processes this morning. Last Friday, I was 277 pounds; and this morning, I was 280 lbs. I felt the old frustration start to build. I have been consistent in my eating and exercise. There isn’t a reason for me to be gaining. And the thought, “I need to be down four pounds in two days,” ran through my mind. I started to analyze my eating, water consumption, and my bodily functions even.
Then I stopped myself. No. I don’t need to be down four pounds in two days. It doesn’t matter if I am up on Friday. Or if I weigh in at 277 again. My weight doesn’t matter.
My behaviors and attitude towards myself are what matters. What matters is I keep weighing, measuring, and logging my food. What matters I keep walking daily. What matters is that I get good sleep. What matters is that I drink a lot of water. What matters is that I am kind to myself. What matters is that I accept my body as wonderful and beautiful just as it is. What matters is that I keep doing what I need to do to get healthier.
This brings me to what I want to talk about tonight. Why doesn’t matter.
I am not talking about medical issues. If you are sick or in pain, you need to figure out why medical professionals help, and not from some person on the internet. If you are in your calorie count, moving daily, and still gaining for a couple of weeks, then yes, there is probably something wrong, and you should see your doctor. I am having eczema breakouts on my elbow and a finger. This says something is off in my immune system. So, yes, this is a why I need to find out.
But right now, why my body is having a temper tantrum really doesn’t matter. I keep doing what I need to do, it will work out. Why isn’t going to make me feel better or move me forward. Why assigns blame and drives you crazy. Often in life, you will never know why.
Now, What matters. What happened? What can I do about it? What changes can I make? What propels me forward. What has a solution.
Now, let’s see if I can maintain my thought process on Friday.